Preparing For Death And Helping The
Dying
Contents
Preface
Introduction
•Death is a natural, inevitable part of life
•It is very important to accept and be aware of death
•Death is not the end of everything, but a gateway into
another life
•It is possible to become free from death and rebirth
How to
Prepare for Death
•The four tasks of living and dying
•Live ethically
•Study spiritual teachings
•Cultivate a spiritual practice
•Become familiar with the stages of the death
process
•Working on our own emotions
•How to help someone who is a Buddhist
•How to help someone who is not a Buddhist
•Helping by accumulating merit
Conclusion
Recommended
Reading
Preparing For Death and Helping the
Dying –
A Buddhist Perspective
PREFACE
This booklet is based on a handout used during a
seminar that I have taught a number of times in Singapore and elsewhere,
entitled “Preparing for Death and Helping the Dying.” This seminar answers a
genuine need in today’s world, as expressed by one participant: “I am
interested to know more about death and how to help dying people, but it’s very
difficult to find anyone willing to talk about these things.”
The material for the seminar
(which I usually teach over 3-4 sessions) is taken mainly from two sources:
traditional Buddhist teachings, and contemporary writings in the field of
caring for the dying. This booklet is meant as a brief introduction to the
subject rather than a detailed explanation. My hope is that it will spark
interest in the ideas presented. For those of you who wish to learn more, a
list of recommended books is provided at the end. There is also a list of
hospice care services in Singapore for those in need of such services for
family members or friends, or for those who would like to serve as a volunteer.
We also plan to continue working on this booklet to improve and expand it, and
publish it for free distribution in the near future. Any ideas, feedback or
suggestions will be gratefully accepted.
INTRODUCTION
Death is a subject that most people do not like to
hear about, talk about, or even think about. Why is this? After all, whether we
like it or not, each and every one of us will have to die one day. And even
before we have to face our own death, we will most probably have to face the
deaths of other people -- our family members, friends, colleagues, and so
forth. Death is a reality, a fact of life, so wouldn’t it be better to approach
it with openness and acceptance, rather than fear and denial?
Perhaps the discomfort we
have towards death is because we think it will be a terrible, painful and
depressing experience. However, it doesn’t have to be so. Dying can be a time
of learning and growth; a time of deepening our love, our awareness of what is
important in life, and our faith and commitment to spiritual beliefs and
practices. Death can even be an opportunity to gain insight into the true
nature of ourselves and all things, an insight which will enable us to become
free from all suffering.
Let’s take the example of
Inta McKimm, the director of a Buddhist centre in Brisbane, Australia. Inta
died of lung cancer in August, 1997. Two months before her death she wrote in a
letter to her Spiritual Teacher, Lama Zopa Rinpoche: “Although I am dying, this
is the happiest time of my life!…. For a long time life seemed so hard, so
difficult. But when really recognizing death it turned into the greatest
happiness. I wouldn’t want anyone to miss out on their own death, the great
happiness that comes with having recognized impermanence and death. This is
quite surprising and unexpected, and extremely joyful. It is the greatest
happiness of my whole life, the greatest adventure and the greatest party!”
Inta spent the last few
months of her life dedicating herself to spiritual practice. At the time of her
death her mind was peaceful, and she was surrounded by family and friends
praying for her. There are many similar stories of Lamas, monks, nuns and
spiritual practitioners who are able to face death with serenity and dignity,
and in some cases are even able to remain in a state of meditation during and
after their death. With the proper training and preparation, a peaceful and
positive death is possible for each and every one of us.
First of all, let’s look at how death is viewed in
the Buddhist tradition.
BUDDHIST
PERSPECTIVES ON DEATH
Death Is A
Natural, Inevitable Part Of Life
People sometimes think of death as a punishment for
bad things they have done, or as a failure or mistake, but it is none of these.
It is a natural part of life. The sun rises and sets; the seasons come and go;
beautiful flowers become withered and brown; people and other beings are born,
live for some time, then die.
The
Buddha imparted the teaching on the inevitability of death in a very skilful
way to one of his disciples, Kisa Gotami. Kisa Gotami was married and had a
child who was very dear to her heart. When the child was about one year old, he
became ill and died. Overcome with grief and unable to accept the death of her
child, Kisa Gotami took him in her arms and went in search of someone who could
bring him back to life. Finally she met the Buddha, and begged Him to help her.
The Buddha agreed, and asked her to bring Him four or five mustard seeds, but
they had to be obtained from a house where no one had ever died
Kisa
Gotami went from house to house in the village, and although everyone was
willing to give her some mustard seeds, she was unable to find a house where
death had not occurred. Gradually she realized that death happened to everyone,
and returned to the Buddha, buried her child and become one of His followers.
Under His guidance, she was able to attain Nirvana, complete freedom from the
cycle of birth and death.
People
may fear that accepting and thinking about death will make them morbid, or
spoil their enjoyment of life’s pleasures. But surprisingly, the opposite is
true. Denying death makes us tense; accepting it brings peace. And it helps us
become aware of what is really important in life – for example, being kind and
loving to others, being honest and unselfish – so that we will put our energy
into those things and avoid doing what would cause us to feel fear and regret
in the face of death.
It Is Very
Important To Accept And Be Aware Of Death
In
the Great Nirvana Sutra, the Buddha
said:
Of all ploughing, ploughing in the autumn is supreme.
Of all footprints, the elephant’s is
supreme.
Of all perceptions, remembering death and
impermanence is supreme.
Awareness and remembrance of death are extremely
important in Buddhism for two main reasons:
1)
By
realising that our life is transitory, we will be more likely to spend our time
wisely, doing positive, beneficial, virtuous actions, and refraining from
negative, non-virtuous actions. The result of this is that we will be able to
die without regret, and will be born in fortunate circumstances in our next
life.
2)
Remembering
death will induce a sense of the great need to prepare ourselves for death.
There are various methods (e.g. prayer, meditation, working on our mind) that
will enable us to overcome fear, attachment and other emotions that could arise
at the time of death and cause our mind to be disturbed, unpeaceful, and even
negative. Preparing for death will enable us to die peacefully, with a clear,
positive state of mind.
Death Is Not
The End Of Everything, But A Gateway Into Another Life
Each of us is made up of a body and a mind. The body
consists of our physical parts – skin, bones, organs, etc. – and the mind
consists of our thoughts, perceptions, emotions, etc. The mind is a continuous,
ever-changing stream of experiences. It has no beginning and no end. When we
die, our mind separates from our body and goes on to take a new life. The type of life we will be born into and
the experiences we will have are determined by the way we live our life.
Positive, beneficial, ethical actions will lead to a good rebirth and happy
experiences, whereas negative, harmful actions will lead to an unfortunate
rebirth and miserable experiences.
Another
factor that is crucial in determining our next rebirth is the state of our mind
at the time of death. We should aim to die with a positive, peaceful state of
mind, to ensure a good rebirth. Dying with anger, attachment or other negative
attitudes will cause us to be born in unfortunate circumstances in our next
life. This is another reason why it is so important to prepare ourselves for
death, because in order to have a positive state of mind at that time, we need
to start now to learn how to keep our
minds free from negative attitudes, and to familiarize ourselves with positive
attitudes, as much as possible.
It Is
Possible To Become Free From Death And Rebirth
Dying and taking rebirth are two of the symptoms of
ordinary, cyclic existence (samsara), the state of continuously-recurring
problems, dissatisfaction, and non-freedom which all of us are caught in. The
reason we are in this situation is because of the presence in our mind of
delusions – chiefly attachment, anger and ignorance – and the imprints of our
actions (karma) performed under the influence of delusions.
The Buddha was once like us,
caught in samsara, but He found a way to become free, and achieved the state of
perfect, complete Enlightenment. He did this not just for His own sake, but for
the sake of all other beings, because he realized that all beings have the
potential to become enlightened – this is called our “Buddha nature”, and it is
the true, pure nature of our minds.
Buddha has the most perfect,
pure compassion and love for all of us, all living beings, and taught us how we
too could become free from suffering and attain enlightenment. That’s what his
teachings, the Dharma, are all about. The Dharma shows us how we can free our
minds from delusions and karma – the causes of death, rebirth and all the other
problems of samsara – and thus to become free from samsara and attain the
ultimate state of enlightenment. Remembering death is one of the most powerful
sources of the energy we need to practise the Buddha’s teachings and thus
attain their blissful results.
Now let’s take a look at some of the ways in which
we can begin preparing ourselves for death.
HOW TO PREPARE FOR
DEATH
The Four
Tasks Of Living And Dying
Christine Longaker, an American woman with over 20
years’ experience working with the dying, has formulated four tasks which will
help us to prepare for death, as well as to live our lives fully and
meaningfully. The four are:
1)
Understanding
and transforming suffering. Basically this means coming to an acceptance of the
various problems, difficulties and painful experiences which are an inevitable
part of life, and learning to cope with them. If we can learn to cope with the
smaller sufferings that we encounter as we go through life, we will be better
able to cope with the bigger sufferings that we will face when we die.
2)
Making
a connection, healing relationships and letting go. This task refers to our
relationships with others, particularly family and friends. The main points
here are to learn to communicate honestly, compassionately and unselfishly, and
to resolve any unresolved problems we may have with others.
3)
Preparing
spiritually for death. Christine writes: “Every religious tradition emphasizes
that to prepare spiritually for death it is vital that we establish right now a
daily spiritual practice, a practice so deeply ingrained that it becomes part
of our flesh and bones, our reflexive response to every situation in life,
including our experiences of suffering.”[i]
A list of recommended spiritual practices from the Buddhist tradition can be
found below.
4)
Finding
meaning in life. Many of us go through life without a clear idea as to what is
the purpose and meaning of our existence. This lack of clarity can become a
problem as we become older and closer to death because we become less capable
and more dependent upon others. So it is important to explore such questions as
“What is the purpose of my life? Why am I
here? What is important and not important?”
These four tasks are fully explained in Facing
Death and Finding Hope by Christine Longaker (London: Century, 1997) p. 37-157.
Live
Ethically
Painful or frightening experiences that occur at the
time of death and afterwards – in the intermediate state and the next rebirth –
are the result of negative actions, or karma. To prevent such experiences, we
need to refrain from negative actions and do as many positive actions as we
can. For example, we can do our best to avoid the ten non-virtuous actions
(killing, stealing, sexual misconduct, harsh speech, lying, slander, gossip,
covetousness, ill-will and wrong views) and
to practise the ten virtues (consciously refraining from killing, etc).
It’s also good to take vows or precepts, and do purification practices on a
daily basis.
Another
aspect of Buddhist ethics is working on our minds to reduce the very causes of
negative actions: delusions, or disturbing emotions, such as anger, greed,
pride, and so forth. And awareness of
death itself is one of the most effective antidotes for delusions. For example,
realizing that we and everyone else will die one day helps us to realize the
futility of hating our enemies and clinging to loved ones. Thus we should try
to resolve our conflicts with others as early as possible so that we do not die
with those burdens on our mind. Also, as we approach death, it’s good to start
giving away our possessions, or at least make a will -- that will help reduce
attachment and worry at the time of death.
Study
Spiritual Teachings
Learning spiritual teachings such as those
given by the Buddha will help us to overcome delusions and negative behaviour,
and will help us to become more wise and compassionate. Also, the more we
understand reality or truth -- the nature of our life, the universe, karma, our
capacity for spiritual development and how to bring it about -- the less we
will be afraid of death.
Cultivate
A Spiritual Practice
As we are dying, we may find
ourselves experiencing physical discomfort and pain. In addition to this, we
will most probably also experience disturbing thoughts and emotions, such as
regrets about the past, fears about the future, sadness about having to
separate from our loved ones and possessions, and anger about the misfortunes
that are happening to us. As mentioned above, it is very important to keep our
mind free from such negative thoughts, and instead to have positive thoughts at
the time of death. Examples of positive thoughts could include:
- keeping in mind an object of our faith such as Buddha
or God,
- calm acceptance of our death and the problems
associated with it,
- non-attachment to our loved ones and possessions,
- feeling positive about the way we have lived our life;
remembering good things we have done;
- feeling loving-kindness and compassion for others.
In order to be able to invoke such thoughts or
attitudes at the time of death, we need to be familiar with them. Familiarity
with positive states of mind depends upon putting time effort into spiritual
practice while we are alive. And the best time to start is now, since we have no way of knowing when death will happen.
Some recommended practices from the Buddhist
tradition include:
1) Taking refuge
In Buddhism, taking refuge
is an attitude of feeling faith in and relying upon the Three Jewels: Buddha,
Dharma and Sangha, accompanied by a sincere effort to learn and practice the
Buddhist teachings in our life. It is said in the Buddhist teachings that
taking refuge at the time of death will ensure that we will obtain a fortunate
rebirth and avoid an unfortunate one in our next lifetime.[ii]
Faith in one’s personal spiritual teachers, or in a specific Buddha or
bodhisattva such as Amitabha or Kuan Yin, will also have the same result and
will bring great comfort to the mind at the time of death.
2) Pure Land practice
A popular practice,
particularly in the Mahayana tradition, is to pray for rebirth in a Pure Land,
such as the Pure Land of Bliss (Sukhavati) of Amitabha Buddha. Pure Lands are manifested by the Buddhas to
aid those who wish to continue their spiritual practice in the next life, free
of the distractions, hassles and interferences of the ordinary world.
Bokar Rinpoche mentions four
essential conditions that need to be cultivated in order to take birth in
Amitabha’s Pure Land: 1) making ourselves familiar with the image of the Pure
Land and meditating upon it; 2) having a sincere wish to be born there, and
making regular prayers for such a rebirth; 3) purifying our negative actions
and accumulating positive actions, and dedicating these to be born in the Pure
Land; 4) having the motivation of bodhicitta—the aspiration to attain
enlightenment (Buddhahood) to be able to help all beings – as the reason for
wishing to be born in the Pure Land.[iii]
3) Mindfulness
Mindfulness is a meditative
practice that involves become aware of whatever is
happening in our body and mind accompanied by
equanimity, free of attachment to what is pleasant and aversion to what is
unpleasant. Strong familiarity with this practice would enable one to cope with
pain, discomfort and disturbing emotions, keep the mind free from disturbing
emotions, and remain peaceful while
dying.
4) Loving-kindness
This practice involves
cultivating feelings of care, concern and kindness towards all other
beings. When we face difficulties
or pain, our strong attachment to ‘I’ augments our suffering; being less
concerned with ourselves and more concerned for others diminishes our
suffering. At the time of death, thinking of other beings and wishing them to
be happy and free from suffering would bring great peace to our mind. It is
also a practice that purifies our negativities and accumulates positive
potential, or merit, which would ensure a good rebirth in the next life.
Become
Familiar With The Stages Of The Death Process
One reason why people tend to be afraid of death is
because they do not know what will happen to them. However, in the Tibetan
tradition of Buddhism, there is a clear and detailed explanation of the process
of dying, which involves eight stages. The eight stages correspond to the
gradual dissolution of various factors, such as the four elements: earth,
water, fire and air. As one passes through the eight stages, there are various
internal and external signs.
The four elements dissolve
over the first four stages. In the first stage, where the earth element
dissolves, the external signs are that one’s body becomes thinner and weaker,
and internally one sees mirages. The second stage involves the dissolution of
the water element; the external sign is that one’s bodily fluids dry up, and
internally one has a vision of smoke. The fire element dissolves in the third
stage; the external sign is that the heat and digestive power of the body
decline, and internally one has a vision of sparks. In the fourth stage, where
the wind or air element dissolves, the external sign is that breathing ceases,
and internally one has a vision of a flame about to go out.
This is the point at which
one would normally be declared clinically death. The gross physical elements
have all dissolved, the breath has stopped, and there is no longer any movement
in the brain or circulatory system. However, according to Buddhism death has
not yet taken place because the mind or consciousness is still present in the
body.
There are various levels of the mind: gross, subtle
and very subtle. The gross mind or consciousness includes our six sense
consciousnesses and eighty instinctive conceptions. The former dissolve over
the first four stages, and the latter dissolves in the fifth stage, following
which one experiences a white vision. In the sixth stage, the white vision
dissolves and a red vision appears. In the seventh stage, the red vision
dissolves and a vision of darkness appears. The white, red and dark visions
constitute the subtle level of consciousness.
Finally, in the eighth stage, the dark vision dissolves and the
very subtle mind of clear light becomes manifest. This is the most subtle and
pure level of our mind, or consciousness, and experienced meditators are able
to use this clear light mind to meditate and gain a realization of absolute
truth, and even attain enlightenment. That is why such meditators are not
afraid of death, and even look forward to death as if they were going on a
holiday!
This is
just a brief explanation of the eight stages. More detailed explanations can be
found in a number of books (see the recommended reading list), such as The Tibetan Book of the Dead, translated
by Robert Thurman, p.23-50. Since we are naturally more frightened of what is
not known to us, becoming familiar with the stages of the death process would
help ease some of our fear of death. And if we are able to practise the
meditations on simulating the death process and awakening the clear light mind
which are found in the Tibetan Vajrayana tradition, we might even be able to attain
realizations as we die.
These are just a few recommended spiritual practices
that we can learn and train ourselves in during the course of our life which
will help us be more prepared for death. However, there are many other methods,
which are suited to people of different temperaments. When it comes to choosing
the method that is right for us, we can use our own intuition and wisdom, or
consult reliable spiritual teachers with whom we have an affinity.
Now let’s look at what we can do to help other people
who are dying.
HELPING OTHERS
WHO ARE DYING
It is said in the Buddhist teachings that helping
another person to die with a peaceful, positive state of mind is one of the
greatest acts of kindness we can offer. The reason for this is that the moment
of death is so crucial for determining the rebirth to come, which in turn will
affect subsequent rebirths.
However, helping a dying
person is no easy task. When people die, they experience numerous difficulties
and changes, and this would naturally give rise to confusion as well as painful
emotions. They have physical needs – relief from pain and discomfort,
assistance in performing the most basic tasks such as drinking, eating, bathing
and so forth. They have emotional needs – to be treated with love, kindness and
respect; to talk and be listened to; or, at certain times, to be left alone and
in silence. They have spiritual needs – to make sense of their life, their
suffering, their death; to have hope for what lies beyond death; to feel that
they will be cared for and guided by someone or something wiser and more
powerful than themselves.
Thus one of the most
important skills in helping a dying person is to try to understand what their
needs are, and do what we can to take care of these. We can best do this by
putting aside our own needs and wishes whenever we visit them, and make up our
mind to simply be there for them, ready to do whatever has to be done, whatever
will help them to be more comfortable, happy and at peace.
There are many excellent
books available on how to care for a dying person in terms of their physical
and emotional needs (see the recommended reading list). Here we will focus on
the spiritual needs and how to provide for these.
1. Working on our own emotions
As mentioned above, when
people approach death they will at times experience disturbing emotions such as
fear, regret, sadness, clinging to the people and things of this life, and even
anger. They may have difficulty coping with these emotions, and may find
themselves overwhelmed, as if drowning in them. What is helpful to them during
these difficult times is to sit with them, listen compassionately and offer
comforting words to calm their minds.
But to be able to do this
effectively, we need to know how to cope with our own emotions. Being in the
presence of death will most probably bring up the same disturbing emotions in
our mind as in the dying person’s mind – fear, sadness, attachment, a sense of
helplessness, and so forth. Some of these emotions we may never have
experienced before, and we may feel surprised and even confused to find them in
our mind. Thus we need to know how to deal with them in ourselves before we can
really help someone else to deal with them.
One of the best methods for
dealing with emotions is mindfulness meditation (explained above). Another is
reminding ourselves of impermanence: the fact that we ourselves, other people,
our bodies and minds, and just about everything in the world around us, is constantly
changing, never the same from one moment to the next. Awareness and acceptance
of impermanence is one of the most powerful antidotes to clinging and
attachment, as well as to fear, which is often a sense of resistance to change.
Also, cultivating firm faith in the Three Jewels of Refuge is extremely useful
in providing the strength and courage we need to face and deal with turbulent
emotions.
If the
dying person is a family member or friend, we will have the additional
challenge of having to deal with the attachments and expectations we have
towards that person. Although it is difficult, the best thing we can do is
learn to let them go. Clinging to them is unrealistic, and will only cause more
suffering for both of us. Again, remembering impermanence is the most effective
remedy to attachment.
2. How to help someone who is a Buddhist
If the
dying person is a Buddhist, ask questions to find out how much they know and
understand, and that should give you a better idea about what to do to help
them spiritually. For example, if the person has strong faith in Kuan Yin, then
you should encourage them to keep that faith in their mind and pray to Kuan Yin
as much as possible. Or if the person were a practitioner of mindfulness
meditation, encourage them to do that practice as often as they can. In short,
whatever teachings and practices they are familiar and comfortable with, remind
them of these and do whatever you can to provide them with confidence and
inspiration to do these practices. If they have difficulty practising on their
own, due to pain or tiredness or a confused state of mind, do the practice with
them.
If
possible, place images of Buddha, Kuan Yin, Amitabha, and so forth within sight
of the person. Speak to them, or read passages from books, about impermanence
and other Buddhist teachings – but do this only if they are receptive, do not
force it on them. Also, do not try to teach them something that would cause
their mind to be confused or upset (for example, if the subject is too
difficult for them to understand, or if it is new and unfamiliar). The most
important thing is to help the person have a peaceful and positive state of
mind before and during their death.
It may be that the dying
person does not know how to meditate or pray. In that case you can meditate or
do other prayers or practices in their presence, dedicating the merit of these
that they have a peaceful mind at the time of death and a good rebirth. You can
also teach them how to pray, by reciting standard Buddhist prayers, or by
praying in their own words, in their own hearts. For example, they can pray to
Buddha, Kuan Yin or whoever they can most easily feel faith in, to be with them
during this difficult time, to help them find the strength and courage to deal
with their suffering and to keep their minds peaceful, and to guide them to a
good rebirth in the next life. Also, to help their minds be free of worry and
anxiety, encourage them to not worry about their loved ones and their
possessions, and to not be afraid of what lies ahead but to have faith in the
Three Jewels. Do what you can to help them cultivate positive thoughts, such as
faith, loving-kindness and compassion, and to avoid negative thoughts such as
anger and attachment.
3. How to help someone who is not a Buddhist
If the
dying person belongs to another religion, make an effort to understand what
they know, understand and believe, and speak to them accordingly. For example,
if they believe in God and heaven, encourage them to have faith in and pray to
God, and to feel hopeful about being with God in heaven after they leave this
life. And have a respectful attitude towards the person and their beliefs and
practices. Remember, the most important thing is to help the person to have
positive thoughts in their mind, in accordance with their religious beliefs and
practices. Do NOT attempt to impose your own beliefs or try to convert them.
That could cause them to become confused and disturbed.
If the
person has no religion, use non-religious terminology to speak to them in ways
that will help them to be free of negative thoughts such as anger and
attachment, and develop positive
thoughts and a peaceful state of mind. If they show interest in knowing what
you believe in, you can tell them, but be careful not to preach. It might be
more effective to have a discussion in which you openly share ideas with each
other, For example, if the person asks you what happens after we die, instead
of immediately launching into an explanation of rebirth, you might say
something like “I’m not really sure. What do you think?” And take it from
there.
If they genuinely wish to
know about Buddhist beliefs and practices, it’s perfectly OK to explain these
to them. You can talk about the Buddha’s life and teachings, the Four Noble
Truths, impermanence, loving-kindness and compassion, and so forth. Just be
sensitive to their response – be careful not to be pushy, otherwise the person
could become negative. Remember, the bottom line is to help them remain free
from negative thoughts as much as possible, and to have a positive, peaceful
state of mind.
If the person is not a Buddhist and would not be comfortable
hearing or seeing you do any Buddhist prayers or practices, you can still do
these practices silently, without them knowing it. For example, you could sit
beside them and meditate on loving-kindness and send the energy of loving
kindness from your heart to fill them with peace. Or you could visualize Buddha
or Kuan Yin above the person’s head and silently recite prayers or mantras
while visualizing a shower of light flowing from the Buddha into the person,
purifying them and helping their mind to become more pure and peaceful. It is
quite possible that the person will feel the effects of these practices even
though they have no idea that they are being done on their behalf!
4. Helping by accumulating merit
After the person has passed away, we can continue to
benefit them by doing positive, virtuous actions – such as saying prayers (or
asking monks and nuns to say prayers), making offerings, releasing animals who
are destined to be slaughtered, doing meditation, etc. – and dedicate the
merits for the person to have a good rebirth, and to quickly become free from
cyclic existence and attain enlightenment. It is perfectly all right to do these
practices whether the person was a Buddhist or not.
It is good to use some of
the person’s own money to create merit, for example, making donations to
charity. Also, merit accumulated by family members (direct relatives of the
deceased person) is especially powerful and helpful. Doing virtuous actions and
dedicating the merits to the deceased can help the person in the bardo (the intermediate state between
death and the next life). However, once they have taken rebirth, the merit we
dedicate may not help them in that life, but could help them in their
subsequent rebirth, for example, by shortening the length of an unfortunate
rebirth.
CONCLUSION
I hope that the ideas presented in this booklet will
help you to be more accepting and less fearful of death, your own and others’.
There is a great wealth of material – from ancient religious and spiritual
traditions as well as from modern fields such as psychology, sociology and
palliative care – that can guide us in living our lives in such a way as to be
peaceful, calm and courageous in the face of death. And when someone we love is
going through that experience, we can be a source of comfort, serenity and hope
for them. May this small work inspire you to learn more on this subject. And
may all beings become free from the sufferings of death, and attain the highest
peace and happiness beyond the cycle of birth and death.